Stop Complaining! How to live harmoniously at work ?

Inspired from my French bestseller “J’arrête de râler!”, read an article in English on “Stop Complaining: How to live harmoniously at work?”  in Marie France, Asia edition! Read full article!

Marie France Asia

“By changing our reflexes, we gradually change our thoughts and feelings,” says Christine Lewicki. To avoid temper tantrums, it is also as important not to suppress your frustration. Be vigilant as to when the pressure rises. Set limits, express your needs to your supervisor, learn how to say no, ask for help…”

I Stop Complaining and {Bitching!} Introduction

This is how my “21 Day Challenge to Stop Complaining {and Bitching}!” started!

This journey gave birth to a French blog and a French Best-selling book ( more than 100 000 copies sold) and today I am committing myself to share the lessons that I have learned along the way with you my English readers on this blog.

Follow the challenge and my journey and please share your own experiences on this blog and keep in touch on Facebook , too!

Say YES to Life!


When we position ourself as a victim and complain about what others or things are making us go through and endure…we are  really rejecting what life has to offer. The quote that follows illustrates and  expands on this idea from Frédéric Lenoir, French author of “Petit traité de vie intérieure” “Little  Inner Life  Treaty “( Plon edition).

“By merely acquiescing to Life, it provides a feeling of gratitude which in itself is a great source of happiness, and allows us to fully embrace the positive and to transform the negative as much as possible. Saying ” yes” is an inner attitude that opens us to life’s motion,  its unpredictability , its unexpected and  surprises.”

Say “YES” to Life!


Everything I want to live by is here

The Optimist Creed 

Promise Yourself

To be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind.

To talk health, happiness, and prosperity to every person you meet.

To make all your friends feel that there is something worthwhile in them.

To look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true.

To think only of the best, to work only for the best and to expect only the best.

To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as you are about your own.

To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future.

To wear a cheerful expression at all times and give a smile to every living creature you meet.

To give so much time to improving yourself that you have no time to criticize others.

To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear, and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.

To think well of yourself and to proclaim this fact to the world, not in loud word, but in great deeds.

To live in the faith that the whole world is on your side, so long as you are true to the best that is in you.

Christian D. Larson in THE PATWAY OF ROSES ( newscastle publishing)

Could you Go a Week Without Bitching? Glamour Magazine

One of our reader fans sent us this link!  “I Stop Complaining …{and Bitching}! is an idea whose time has come and going main stream! Discover  the article in the March issue of Glamour Magazine! My question is : can you go 21 days without Bitching? Take the challenge! and let us know how you did!

Could you Go a Week Without Bitching? 

Glamour Magazine – March 2014

GLAMOUR march-2014

Glamour Magazine - article on Bitching

Glamour Magazine - article on Bitching

Glamour Magazine - article on Bitching

I am NOT a Victim!

When we feel like a victim, victimized by our boss, our job, ( or lack of job), the economic crisis, politics, spouse, our family, we tend to victimize ourselves on our own especially in our conversations. We waste a lot of energy blaming others and not taking any responsibility. It’s everybody’s fault  – our spouse,  children, boss, colleagues, the President, the administration, service providers  – and the list goes on and on…. and on! We have nothing to do with it!

Pointing finger

 Personally, I discovered that I became quite an expert and developed  a talent to point the fingers at all the guilty people in my life. In some ways, it’s pleasant to be a victim because if the other person is wrong then it must means I am right!  If the other person is guilty then it’s his or her responsibility to find a solution  to the problem, it’s not mine! But in the end , what  I found  very troublesome lying just under the surface is that if I accuse the other person then it really implies that I am powerless and can do nothing about the situation!

Sometimes it’s actually easier to be a victim than to have the courage to stand up and take some action. When I act like a victim, I am in fact really giving away all my power to be able to create my own reality. In the end, I am the one who will suffer the consequences.

When I position myself as a victim in my conversations, I am making  a choice  to surrender my power to all the “guilty people” in my life. I point the finger and put my life and destiny in their  hands. One day I understood that I had the power to refuse pointing the finger  and  take full responsibility for my feelings and actions. Everyone can do it  too!

In our conversations when we talk to our friends, family or colleagues about our life,  we all have a need to open-up and share our problems .  Close friends and  our loved ones can provide this safety net of  non-judgemental compassion and support.  I am not saying that we cannot talk about our worries or problems, but we have to  remember that we also  have the power to REFUSE to play the role of a victim

This was a great eye-opener for me in my life! I  became aware that I was the one who victimized myself in my conversations and that in the end I had the choice to stop doing it.  I realized that when I act like a victim, I am actually giving away my power to others and empowering the guilty ones.  It’s not my fault  therefore I can do nothing about it and I am powerless to find a solution to my problem.

 It’s a great feeling when we become aware that we can choose not  to give away  our power! By changing what we say in our conversations , we can choose to empower the guilty ones or not.

Imagine, if you no longer point the finger and play the victim , if others are not guilty either then everything becomes possible, doesn’t it?

What are your thoughts?

I Stop Complaining on TEDx Talks

Christine Lewicki’s TEDx Talk on her life challenge “I Stop Complaining!” from the  French bestseller  “J’arrête de râler!”  is now available subtitled in English! (Just click on transcript” on You Tube) Enjoy and please share!

Christine Lewicki, mother of 3 children, business coach comes to the sudden realisation after  a “horrible” day that she has just lived an ordinary day of her daily  life and decides that evening  that complaining & bitching will never again be an option!